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Wedding Gifts: Sending Thank You Notes and Cards

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There are some things for which the “easy” way is not the best way. Bridal couples are very busy people both before and after their wedding day, but that’s no excuse for resorting to bad behavior!

Dear Wedding Guru: “We’ve received lots of wedding gifts (and we haven’t even had our wedding yet)! We also got great gifts for our engagement party and I got really cool stuff at my two bridal showers. I’ve been sending hand-written thank-you notes for everything, and it’s taking a long, long time. I asked my fiancé to help me, but he balked. He says that it’d be so much easier to send them emails (he insists that there’s nothing wrong with that). I disagree. Can you help?”

(Our answer on next page)

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The Wedding Guru says: You win this round. It’s absolutely correct to hand-write thank-you notes to each of the guests who give you a wedding present. The notes should be personalized. I’m not in favor of thank-you cards that have a photo of the couple and a printed note — there’s no reason why both the bride and the groom should not participate in the writing! To make it easier for you and for your fiancé, if you’re at a loss for words, there are many Web sites that offer wording at no charge. Feel free to copy and use them. Here are a few tips that may help you both:

  • Mention the gift that you received. If you got cash, then thank the giver for their check and, if you can (truthfully) say to what expense the cash will go, that’d be lovely.
  • Depending on how well you know the gift-giver, address it to either “Dear [First Name] or “Dear [Mr./Mrs. Last Name]”; i.e. “Dear John” or “Dear Mr. Smith.”
  • If you get a gift that wasn’t listed on your registry, you might write something like “It’s certainly a unique gift; you’re always so thoughtful and generous.”

By the way, sending out your cards should not take longer than two or three weeks after your wedding day!

» More on thank-you notes and cards
» More from The Wedding Guru
» Submit a question to the Wedding Guru
» Hudson Valley Weddings 2012

 

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