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Subtle Ways to Honor Family Members (Without Ticking Off Your OCD Groom)


Weddings are all about sharing an important union with your loved ones. It’s wonderful if a couple wants to involve their families in both traditional and nontraditional ways. This bride-to-be has found a way to do the latter — except she’s being met with resistance from an unlikely (and inflexible) person.

Dear Wedding Guru:
“I’d like to honor our parents and some of our family members by having them walk down the aisle before my fiancé and I. Unfortunately, my fiancé is really unhappy that there isn’t an even number of people (i.e. two by two). I’ve explained that we can add some close friends in order to balance the count, but he’s pretty adamant against that. How can I make this work and still make my fiancé happy?” — Crossing the Line

Dear Crossing the Line:
I agree that honoring your family is a wonderful idea and, frankly, don’t understand the issue about “even” numbers. However, it’s also your groom’s wedding, and this may be the first of many compromises the two of you will need to make in your life together. If you can’t win him over to “your side,” then perhaps you can pare the group down to your grandparents and parents and find another way to honor the rest of your family.

For instance, right after your “first dance,” the emcee could announce that you’d like some “very special people in your lives” to join you on the dance floor. In that way, you’d give them the honors you want to bestow upon them — while acquiescing to your groom’s wishes.

Have a wedding question? Write to me at judy@hvmag.com

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