Paying for a Wedding: Post Wedding Bills Belong to the Bride and Groom, Not the Parents

The parents of a groom agree to help finance the wedding, but the after-ceremony bills are more than they bargained for

It bears repeating that neither the parents of the bride nor of the groom are under any obligation to pay any part of their child’s wedding. If they choose to do so, it is a gift, not a requirement. Unfortunately, this issue creates many ill feelings, as in the case of these parents. Read on…

Dear Wedding Guru: “Our son got married a few weeks ago. We have a lovely home, so we offered it to him and his fiancée to use as the wedding’s location, since they were on a budget. The wedding came off without a hitch — but now, several weeks later, we’re getting bills for things that we never agreed to pay for. Before his wedding, we made it clear that we’d offer our home and would cover several other fairly big ticket items. Our gift to the couple nearly matched what the bride’s family paid for. We’re in a very uncomfortable position — what should we do?”

(Our answer on next page)

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The Wedding Guru says: In three words, “just don’t pay!” The first thing you need to do is talk to your son. Tell him you think the reception went really well, it was your pleasure to provide your home — and that you were happy to pay for what you agreed to before the wedding. Explain that you did not promise to pay for anything beyond your pre-wedding agreement, and the post-ceremony bills are a burden. Then defer all bills to his address.

» More on paying for a wedding
» More from The Wedding Guru
» Submit a question to the Wedding Guru
» Hudson Valley Weddings 2012

 

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