Flower Girl FAQ (part two)

The Wedding Guru Judy Lewis fields this week’s wedding questions. Today: A local dressmaker chimes in on what the flower girl should wear to your ceremony

Last week, we discussed the role of the flower girl at a wedding and how to properly go about selecting one. Now, it’s step two — what to wear!

A Valley bride asks: “I’ve always wanted a flower girl at my wedding, but now that I’ve chosen her, I’m not sure what to do about her clothing. What should keep in mind? I don’t want to make this tough on the little girl’s mom. Should I offer to pay for her dress?”

Dear bride: Traditionally, the parents are responsible for the flower girl’s dress, so that shouldn’t be a surprise to them if they accept your invitation for their daughter to be a part of your ceremony (by the way, make sure to ask the parents! See last week’s post about how to do this). It’s up to you to tell them the styles and colors, and perhaps even the fabric, that will coordinate with the rest of the bridal party.

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For advice from a local professional, I checked with Tracy Young, who has been creating flower girl dresses in her Freehold shop, A Little Indulgence, since 2006. Young explained that the flower girl’s dress should be short enough so that she doesn’t trip on it; shoes should be worn before the event to ensure that they are comfortable and not slippery. Because children grow, make alterations no earlier than one month before the wedding date. She adds, “Watch out for the ‘itchies’ that lead to the ‘wiggles’ — the result of too much of a tulle underskirt.”

Made-to-order dresses at A Little Indulgence start at $185 for a standard size, and custom dresses can be made for all sizes. Young also offers “couture” dresses, including a miniature version of the bride’s gown for the flower girl’s dress.

Young stresses that it’s important to rehearse and let the little girl know what}s expected of her. “Both the bride and the flower girl’s mother should be prepared for spontaneity,” she says. “It’s these unanticipated actions that are a part of what makes a wedding memorable and unique!”

By appointment, Young travels throughout the Hudson Valley with samples.

Keep in mind that, as with most aspects of a wedding, nothing is written in stone. When you offer the invitation, make sure that you clearly communicate your wishes. If you feel that the cost of the flower girl’s dress will place an undue burden on her parents — yet you’re adamant about the exact look you want — then I suggest that you offer to pay part or all of the flower girl’s dress. Don’t forget that a wedding may be an adult event, but little ones should wear age-appropriate clothing. You’ll do the mom a big favor if the dress you choose can be altered after the wedding and given a “second life.” As always, try to be as accommodating as possible and keep from going over the top.

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To submit your own question to the Wedding Guru, email Judy at judy@hvmag.com.

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