Ditch the Doggy Bags

The Wedding Guru Judy Lewis fields this week’s wedding questions. Today: Leftovers have no place at this wedding

Having been the “Mother of” three times, I know that the moms and the brides want everything to be just right. Sometimes what we think is “just right” is actually just too much. Read on…

A bride asks: “Our wedding is a mix of traditions. I’m Jewish and my fiancé is Italian — we both grew up in homes where more food was always better than less, and second helpings were a must. So my problem is that my Jewish mother and his Italian mother are driving us crazy over the food we’ll serve at our wedding! It’s not the kind of food that’s the problem, it’s the amount — and quality — of food. Nothing would make our moms happier than making sure every guest takes home foil-wrapped leftovers… in the shape of a swan. My fiancé and I disagree. How do we keep this wedding from becoming a reality TV show?”

Dear bride: It’s tough when you’re fighting years and years of food history! Psychologists and historians have proposed very valid reasons why people feel it’s appropriate — and necessary — to stuff their guests. I believe its roots go way back to times of deprivation and the wish to show that, today, all is well. Talk to your moms! You can explain that, nowadays, most people are very weight-conscious. Point out that people will find an overabundance of food to be distasteful and not attractive. You can also explain that the extra food will most likely be left on the table, and that many guests won’t take home the leftovers. If that speech doesn’t work, then let the moms do what they want and make arrangements for the leftovers to be delivered to a local food pantry. That makes for a win-win. Eat hearty!

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To submit your own question to the Wedding Guru, email Judy at judy@hvmag.com.

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