I Wore White to the Wedding (and Left Wearing Black and Blue)
One wedding guest breaks the cardinal rule and dons a white suit at a wedding. Is this forgivable or forever a faux-pas?
Etiquette is defined as “a code of behavior that delineates expectations for social behavior according to contemporary conventional norms within a society, social class, or group.” In today’s society, the etiquette about weddings has relaxed significantly. Most people know how to behave properly, but even the best of us goof up at one time or another!
A Hudson Valley wedding guest asks: “I recently wore a white linen suit to an outdoor wedding. I thought that since the wedding colors were purple and black, with the bridesmaids in black, that my suit would be appropriate. If brides can wear colors and bridesmaids can wear black, I felt that the rule of “no white” had also been shelved. Apparently I was wrong, because at the reception the bride made a point of coming over and berating me for my poor taste. I’m besides myself.”
(See our answer on next page)
Dear Hudson Valley wedding guest: Strictly speaking, wearing either white or black to a wedding is no longer a firm “not to do.” Instead, the choice of colors is up to the guest, who can chose whatever is in style and suits her. The only restriction about wearing white is that you don’t want to compete with (or be mistaken for) the bride, who may or may not wear white..
The real breach of etiquette was not yours, but the bride’s. Unless she was a very, very close friend of yours, or a close relative who had your best interests at heart, no one should have said anything to you about what you were wearing. For your part, just forget about the event and rack it up to someone else’s poor taste.