Can We Tell You Now?

The Wedding Guru Judy Lewis fields this week's wedding questions. Today: You’re engaged! So... when do you tell everyone?



Weddings are all about celebrations — and who doesn’t like to celebrate when hearing news of an impending marriage? For the bride who chooses to “play by the rules,” there are etiquette guidelines about everything wedding-related — even including when to announce the wedding itself!

A bride asks: “My future in-laws have very generously offered to host a party honoring our engagement. Mine is a question about timing such an event: We became engaged in December, but our wedding isn’t until the spring, So when is it appropriate to hold the party?”

» For related engagement Q&As, read Judy’s previous blog post “Engaged!

Dear bride: Traditionally, the engagement party should occur as close as possible to the engagement date, irrelevant of when the wedding date is scheduled. (The purpose of an engagement party is for the parents of the bride to “announce” their daughter’s engagement to their friends and families.) At the time of the party, it’s assumed that the guests wouldn’t already know about your engagement — something that today, due mostly to e-mail, isn’t necessarily true.

Since tradition isn’t always the guiding factor nowadays, thank your in-laws, apprize them of the “custom,” and ask them to host the party whenever it’s convenient for them.

To submit your own question to the Wedding Guru, email Judy at judy@hvmag.com.


Your To-Dos Before the I-Dos

About This Blog

Congratulations — you're involved in a wedding! Tying the knot shouldn't put knots in your stomach, so whether you're the blushing bride or hubby-to-be, an attendant or a guest, Wedding Guru Judy Lewis can answer all your need-to-know questions about your nuptials.

Judy Lewis is the founder of HudsonValleyWeddings.com, the one-stop resource for services and products, promotions and specials, a Regional Bridal Show schedule, Wed Shop, and links to money-saving and wedding-related Web sites. In her spare time, Judy loves to compose poetry and create collages. She currently resides in Kingston with her husband and business partner, Jon.

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